knight in armour

nothing new, or interesting to tell except for my boring work. i won't go into that because there's no point to that at all.

oh yes, syarif's back. i took 3 days off and spend most of the days in port dickson. that alone should have given me new strength to start anew, surprisingly it didn't and seriously, i need some deep thinking about this.

everyone deserves a chance at being happy and if i'm not happy where i am now, i shouldn't push myself just to make others happy. sometimes, a little bit of selfishness is all needed to take the big step. part of the blame is on me, i admit, because i always think that something good is sure to come along, if i'm patient enough. the thing is patience is never my forte and with all the whining i keep throwing around, it's a wonder if God wills to every of my whims. in my case, i think God want me to brave the first step, WITH His assistance, of course.

i realise that when it comes to making the right decision, i will be all alone. there will be strong supporters, i must say, but somehow that won't amount to anything because in everything i decide in the end will always be backed up. what i need is some convincing sound advice, giving the hard facts of every turn taken. because in the end, when things didn't work out as planned, the self-proclaimed supporters would say 'i told you so' forgetting the thumbs-up they give earlier.

in light of all this, i am still waiting for the shooting star to fall in my lap.